Love should sound unloving

Often in our modern culture, and especially recently, I've seen a common theme among many people, especially in the west, that characterize love as affirming, approving and fully comfortable. The usual suspects of this definition are used by insecure people to please the ears of insecure people. Otherwise, this definition is used to guilt trip and punish someone that does not align with their belief system:
"Wow, for being a Christian, you're sure not loving like Jesus when you're telling people that they'll go to hell if they don't agree with you."
"Ain't no love like Christian love!" (🤓)
"You Christians just really hate gay people! You should be loving with gay people!"
"You Christians hate every other religion! Why can't you just love everyone like me?!"
"LGBT people are just loving who they're supposed to love! Why is there anything wrong with that?!?!"

(I physically cringed writing each of those.)

This definition of love is not only unorthodox but completely counterintuitive.
Let me give an example that's easy to grasp:
If you are a parent, you know that probably over 80% of actions that your children commit, especially when younger, will be wrong.
Is it loving for a parent to affirm every action their child commits? Some things that a child does can put their life in danger if they don't know better, which they'll keep doing if not corrected otherwise. For me, I was physically disciplined whenever I did something stupid, physically hurt someone etc., and it's safe to say that you did not find me doing most of those things again.

But, I wouldn't have known better if my parents were not loving enough to correct me in the meantime. As my Mom always said,
"I love you too much for you to get away with doing this."

I also find this analogy helpful: (variants of it are also used quite frequently in evangelism)
Let's say that you are in the passenger seat of a car being driven by someone you know. It could be an acquaintance, a best friend or family.
All of a sudden, this person you know, let's say your best friend, starts driving toward a cliff. But, your friend recently told you that they're really insecure about being told that they're bad drivers, and if you tell them they're going in the wrong direction, they'll become upset.
Now, what do you do?

Do you to tell them to sharply turn away from that cliff to save their life and your own?
Or do you tell them, "You're doing a great job at driving!"

The obvious answer is the former. However, it boggles my mind that some people demonize positions akin to it. Such a misconstrued conception is very dangerous.
This is not to say that you shouldn't have compassion for someone and their insecurities, but it is much more loving to help steer someone in the right direction rather than telling them to keep going which will always render much worse and dire results; i.e. death.

If you truly love someone, you'll steer them away from what they're doing wrong.
Ironically, whenever someone tries to argue against someone using this definition, they're using the Christian definition by trying to steer them away from doing wrong. (Of course, most instances of this argument source from backlash and hatred, but it is interesting logic.)

But as with all things, let's look at how Jesus loved people:

In John 8, Jesus comes back to the temple where the Pharisees brought a woman that was caught in adultery. In verses 9-11, Jesus is alone with the woman and asks her,
“Woman, where are they? Has no one condemned you?”
The woman replies,
“No one, Lord.”
Then, Jesus said,
“Neither do I condemn you; go, and from now on sin no more.”

That really is the whole point of the article; right there!
If we are to truly love someone, we hate the sin and love the person. We want to remove sin from our life to Glorify God and to become closer to Him. As Christians we have tasted of God's goodness and would not be loving or following God's commandments to not share it with others. Brethren, do not fear such remarks or any empty words that attack the Spirit.

Jesus said to them, “If God were your Father, you would love me, for I came from God and I am here. I came not of my own accord, but he sent me.
- John 8:42.

From Aedan:

In our society we have adopted a false sense of reality that to love someone means to affirm everything they do. However, love, in its most true form, is not about constant affirmation, it’s about deep commitment to another person’s growth and well-being. While affirmation can be comforting, uncritical acceptance can sometimes become a barrier to maturity, healing, or truth. Real love steps beyond comfort into the realm of responsibility. It recognizes when someone is steering off course and, rather than staying silent, it dares to speak up. This is not control or condescension, but an expression of care that’s willing to risk discomfort for the sake of integrity. In parenting, for example, the most loving actions are often those that involve boundaries and discipline. In friendships, the most memorable moments of love are not when someone simply agreed, but when they challenged us kindly and firmly because they saw what we could become. Correction, in these moments, becomes a form of investment: it’s the hard but necessary labor of helping someone untangle themselves from illusions or self-damaging habits. At its core, this kind of love is governed by compassion, clarity, and courage. Love like this doesn’t flatter: it fortifies. It strengthens rather than soothes, restores rather than resigns. And while it may sting at first, this kind of love often leaves the deepest and most enduring mark not because it accepted everything, but because it cared enough not to.